Sunday, August 26, 2007

Hello again, Mr. J-Bart from J-Town... seem to have a knack for driving in the winning run the last couple of days. To the tune of your second straight MotH:

Of course, while you're the MotH, Mr. Baker is the DotD, with many congradulations:

At least now people can stop asking Mrs. Baker if she has a bun in the oven.

Oh, and welcome back:

A great four games. And lest we forget:

Take that, song birds incorrectly named after a completely unrelated Old World Bird!

MotH, August 25, 2007

Holy hell, boys. Great game. Ye Olde Pirate Matt GaRRRza got hi'self in some jams, but managed to escape with minimal damage, and his jolly crew carried the load for the six thru ninth innings.

However, he's not the MotH. Four walks is NOT a MotHworthy performance.

Kudos to Torii for the three-run dinger.

However, even a three-run shot wasn't enough to get the MotH.

Driving in two runs (the second one being the one to win the game, even if no more runs were plated) and making a twisty-turvy-lopsided catch-and-glove-toss-to-LNP for an out (and quite possibly saving a run) all while going four-fer-four is. So, J-Bart from Jasonville, welcome to the MotH.

Saturday, August 25, 2007

Well, that was nice.

Usually twins pitchers lose games they deserve to win, not the other way around.

Better be saying thank you to alot of guys, Santana. But no one more that this guy:

Yes, Jason Kubel, former Prime Minister of Lower Saxony*, is the MotH.

*I know it's a stretch, but damnit, I couldn't think of anything. If any of you readers want to suggest something, let me know. Perhaps a contest of some sort. Name that Kubel!

Besides, why should a guy shy away from a history lesson just because it has nothing to do with baseball, Minnesota, or modern times?

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Sometimes it's the little things.

And by little things, I mean little people.

Why him, you ask, despite Boof's great performance? Well, he had more that one hit (one of them a double), including the first of the eight-innig rally. He scored two of the runs, which were good enough for at least a tie.

Hell, who am I kidding - as much as his offense has sucked this year, the two hits were enough to seal the deal for me.

But I can't forget this guy-

-For going deep in the game and only giving up one run.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Kudos to Carlos Silvaback for the seven inning two run performance, but it's nice to see that Cuddy's a nature conservationist as well as DJ and magician.

That, and grand slams are an almost automatic MotH.

Sunday, August 19, 2007


...when a guy hits a home run that is the winning run, he'd be the MotH.


But when your starting pitcher scatters two hits in eight innings amongst 17 - sevenF'Nteen - strikeouts, well, you can't say anything but "Holy poop on a stick, are you ever the MotH."

Yes, that is a photo-mashup of Danny Trejo, star of the upcoming sure to be cult classic "Machete," directed by Robert Rodriguez. A bad-ass pitcher and a bad-ass movie. Pure awesome.

Friday, August 17, 2007

The last three games...

Sometimes, the endangered Silvaback Gorilla needs help. Sometimes giving up only one run through seven innings isn't enough. Sometimes, it takes a Tiny Superhero to take matters into his own hands and win the damn game, by getting his tiny ass to third and scoring on a wild pitch. So in other words...

As far as the last two against the Mariners...

Back to back MotH. 1st game? 4-fer-4, 3 RBI. 2nd game? Grand Slam. You = win. At least versus the Mariners, who I used to love, before they totally treated the Big Unit like total crap, which is really stupid. And your loss = Minnesota's gain. So take that, you sea fairimg buttholes.

Oh yeah - Garza and Baker? You were awesome too. Twas good to see Baker bake up a one run masterpiece, and GaRRRza pirate a win against the merchant maweiners.

Yeah, my puns suck. Deal with it.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

How do you go Oh-fer-a Zillion with RISP and still win?

You DON'T. For the love of the game, IT'S INFREAKIN' POSSIBLE!

Matt, buddy, awesome game. Too bad your teammates don't realize that a pitcher with no run support is like a pirate with no treasure. You still rocked though, Mr GaRRRza. I can't believe you're one-and-three. Call Bradke, see how he dealt with it.

To those of you who got on base, stole second, drew walks, way to go. But it's all meaningless unless someone drives you across the plate. And no one did. And I bet you're even more frustrated than I am.

Smell 'em? Smell 'em? The only thing I smelled tonight was ass-bats and missed opportunities galore.

Dammit anyway.

Bam! Boom! Whoosh!

Nineteen hits + Eleven Runs + every starter got a hit (LNP got a DOUBLE! He hit the ball about...a hundred and twenty times his height!) + We gots teh win = 3, yes THREE MotH.

3 hits, a two run homer, and 3 RBI for both these guys:

And four-for-five with a RBI for this gentleman:

Why yes, I agree! A great day for golfing! AND Baseball!

Sunday, August 5, 2007

So, how do you follow up an eight inning one run gem?

Why, with an eight inning, NO run gem.

Complete with Lego-Vision worthy dive for a bunt into a double play (hint hint, Anne!)

So anyway, yeah: Your second consecutive start = your second consecutive MotH. Booyah!

Of course, I can't forget Castilla who drove in the winning - and only (*cough* o'fer'12 CMH *cough*) - run tonight. So, lemme pause this post and go whip something up (NOTE: you will not be subjected to an actual pause, only a simulated pause, as witnessed by the dots below)


Yeah, yeah. Too obvious. Whatever.

4.5 out, bitches!

Saturday, August 4, 2007

Welcome Back...

Saturday, August 8:

Two things stand out to me, looking at this mock-up.

One, I really shouldv'e photochopped some head-phones onto Cuddy back in the day.

Two, Denny's head is HUGE. I don't mean in the picture, either - I mean his noggin is ENORMOUS. That image? Scaled down. I bet that lil' extra weight around his mid-section is just to keep the extra weight up top from adding unwanted movement to his pitches.

But back on topic - driving in two runs, the second the game winner? Hellz yeah Mike's the MotH.

Special mention to our bullpen (crainially endowed or not) for keeping the Racially Insensitive from crossing home plate.

And Garza - 93 pitches in four innings? You'd better wash their feet with your tears of gratitude, young fella.

P.S. - You still deserve better than 1-2 on the year.

P.P.S. - You also pitched out of some hella-jams there, so I guess you can just wash their feet with tap water.

5.5 out, bitches!